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Nara Shikamaru, Sabaku no Kankurou, and an item that definitly isn't normally used by ninja; cut
“Where’s Temari?” they snapped at eachother in the same breath.
“How should I know? She’s your sister.”
“So what? She’s your girlfriend.”
“That crude, violent, graceless, bad-tempered harpy is most certainly not my girlfriend!”
“WHAT did you just call my sister?!?”
“Nothing she hasn’t fully earned. After going out with her I’m more certain than ever that women just aren’t worth the trouble.”
“Ohh, it’s like that, is it? I always kinda suspected that about you, Nara.”
“…Did you just question my sexuality, you make-up-wearing, kabuki-obsessed freak?!”
“There can’t be much to question, if a girl as hot as my sister ain’t doing it for ya.”
The two of them stared at eachother.
“You know, you two always did seem unusually close,” Shikamaru said suddenly, in a conversational tone. “I guess if you can’t keep it in your pants you might as well keep it in the family. Is that the real reason Gaara is so screwed up?”
“WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!!?”
“Oh, you heard me!”
“I’LL KILL YOU FOR THAT!”
“JUST YOU TRY IT! You’re the one person in the group who’s weaker than me at close combat, puppet-boy!”
“NOT WITH THIS!” Kankurou snarled back triumphantly, whipping out a the item he’d concealed at the small of his back and pointing it at his opponent.
Shikamaru froze, staring.
Kankurou smiled cruelly. “It’s called a gun. They have this almost-magical ability to-“
“I KNOW WHAT A GUN IS, YOU RAVING DRAMA-QUEEN! I JUST CAN’T BELIEVE YOU’RE POINTING ONE AT ME!”
“Hah!” Kankurou’s smirk faded to a more confused expression. “…What’s a drama queen?”
“You are, baka!”
“I’m stupid?! You’re the one threatening someone who could kill you with the twitch of a finger! You can’t use your chakra so you can’t evade, can’t use a replacement technique, can’t even use your precious-“
“KAGE MANE NO JUTSU!!”
Blackness welled at Shikamaru’s feet, launching itself across the tile at the larger boy like a spill of ink. The smug look on Kankurou’s face vanished, leaving him pasty with fear.
“N-Nara, what are you doing?” He whispered, as the dark-haired boy tilted his hands. Kankurou mimicked the motion, slowly turning the gun away from his opponent and towards himself.
“Shikamaru, this isn’t funny.”
”Do I look like I’m laughing?” His eyes went distant for a moment. “…Do you know if I turned around, went inside, walked up the flight of stairs and took two lefts that you’d walk yourself off the edge of the building over there? And it would be so easy, as easy as pulling that trigger. I wouldn’t even have to watch you do it, I’d be inside, staring at a painting of a field of flowers,” Shikamaru said softly. The gun hung tensely in Kankurou’s shaking hands as the shadow-user stared at his own, fingers cupped around empty air. Abruptly, his arm whipped out, sending the weapon flying out of Kankurou’s hand as it imitated the gesture.
Kankurou grinned. “I knew you couldn’t do it, Nara. I-“
Equally without preamble, Shikamaru reached out, grabbed a handful of nothing, and swung his hand up towards his head. Unfortunately, the space occupying the same position that Kankurou’s hand landed in was filled by a smooth-headed mace held by a suit of armor. He crumpled to the floor with a muffled thud, the mace making a much tinnier sound as it landed next to him.
Shikamaru released the technique, and his shadow snapped back into its proper place.
“How troublesome,” he muttered, turning away.
“Where’s Temari?” they snapped at eachother in the same breath.
“How should I know? She’s your sister.”
“So what? She’s your girlfriend.”
“That crude, violent, graceless, bad-tempered harpy is most certainly not my girlfriend!”
“WHAT did you just call my sister?!?”
“Nothing she hasn’t fully earned. After going out with her I’m more certain than ever that women just aren’t worth the trouble.”
“Ohh, it’s like that, is it? I always kinda suspected that about you, Nara.”
“…Did you just question my sexuality, you make-up-wearing, kabuki-obsessed freak?!”
“There can’t be much to question, if a girl as hot as my sister ain’t doing it for ya.”
The two of them stared at eachother.
“You know, you two always did seem unusually close,” Shikamaru said suddenly, in a conversational tone. “I guess if you can’t keep it in your pants you might as well keep it in the family. Is that the real reason Gaara is so screwed up?”
“WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!!?”
“Oh, you heard me!”
“I’LL KILL YOU FOR THAT!”
“JUST YOU TRY IT! You’re the one person in the group who’s weaker than me at close combat, puppet-boy!”
“NOT WITH THIS!” Kankurou snarled back triumphantly, whipping out a the item he’d concealed at the small of his back and pointing it at his opponent.
Shikamaru froze, staring.
Kankurou smiled cruelly. “It’s called a gun. They have this almost-magical ability to-“
“I KNOW WHAT A GUN IS, YOU RAVING DRAMA-QUEEN! I JUST CAN’T BELIEVE YOU’RE POINTING ONE AT ME!”
“Hah!” Kankurou’s smirk faded to a more confused expression. “…What’s a drama queen?”
“You are, baka!”
“I’m stupid?! You’re the one threatening someone who could kill you with the twitch of a finger! You can’t use your chakra so you can’t evade, can’t use a replacement technique, can’t even use your precious-“
“KAGE MANE NO JUTSU!!”
Blackness welled at Shikamaru’s feet, launching itself across the tile at the larger boy like a spill of ink. The smug look on Kankurou’s face vanished, leaving him pasty with fear.
“N-Nara, what are you doing?” He whispered, as the dark-haired boy tilted his hands. Kankurou mimicked the motion, slowly turning the gun away from his opponent and towards himself.
“Shikamaru, this isn’t funny.”
”Do I look like I’m laughing?” His eyes went distant for a moment. “…Do you know if I turned around, went inside, walked up the flight of stairs and took two lefts that you’d walk yourself off the edge of the building over there? And it would be so easy, as easy as pulling that trigger. I wouldn’t even have to watch you do it, I’d be inside, staring at a painting of a field of flowers,” Shikamaru said softly. The gun hung tensely in Kankurou’s shaking hands as the shadow-user stared at his own, fingers cupped around empty air. Abruptly, his arm whipped out, sending the weapon flying out of Kankurou’s hand as it imitated the gesture.
Kankurou grinned. “I knew you couldn’t do it, Nara. I-“
Equally without preamble, Shikamaru reached out, grabbed a handful of nothing, and swung his hand up towards his head. Unfortunately, the space occupying the same position that Kankurou’s hand landed in was filled by a smooth-headed mace held by a suit of armor. He crumpled to the floor with a muffled thud, the mace making a much tinnier sound as it landed next to him.
Shikamaru released the technique, and his shadow snapped back into its proper place.
“How troublesome,” he muttered, turning away.